Baby is 16 weeks

The hives keep coming back. :(

If this continues, I may have to spend my days and nights with oatmeal, in the bathtub. The baths help a little, but doesn't take the hives away. Soaking in the tub is relaxing...until the baby wakes up. I am reminded why a water birth is so helpful.

My stomach muscles must have taken a permanent vacation. I feel quite fat and out of shape. I guess round is a shape, but I'm only 4 months along. I really shouldn't be looking so pregnant. Of course the thought of twins always pops into my mind, but 7 babies and it hasn't happened so it probably won't with this pregnancy either.

I have been praying for the birth. I may have full confidence in our birthing choice but without God, I don't know where I'd be. At the mercy of the hospital, I suppose.

I am praying for a smooth, uncomplicated labor and delivery. Most of my labors have started during the night but then continued on into the afternoon. I'm praying again to labor at night but to have the baby well before the sun rises. A short labor will be so different and so welcomed. I should have prayed that I wouldn't dread every contraction with my last labor. I never felt that I lost focus last time, but the dread of the coming contractions was very defeating. I am praying for not only strength for each contraction, but complete peace and restfulness in between the contractions. This time I really want to be able to cooperate more with my mental desire to ease the baby out and not just go with my body's intense compulsion to eject the baby out with one push. I don't want to keep testing the water's ability to keep me from tearing. I believe when I commit every single thought to God that He would be faithful and give me peace and strength to labor well.

This will be my first winter birth. I am especially thankful that Chris should be here to keep the pool warm and to support me during the birth.